Odors are a part of food…they lure us in and they also repel us. Some smells, such as garlic and onion, are wonderful when permeating through the air – but on your breath – well, they’re not so wonderful. I recently purchased a new Asian marinade to try with my stir-fry the other night. The second I opened the bottle and got a whiff of it, I reeled - it smelled exactly like the breath of a gal that used to do my facials…it kind of grossed me out.
But let’s start with the Good smells…like bread or cookies baking. Did you know that if you are selling your house and have cookies baking in the oven while prospective buyers are checking your place out, they will have a more favorable reaction to your home? I don’t know about you, but the first thing I notice when entering someone’s home is the smell. Baking cookies during an open house is a wise way to go – totally over-powers other household odors and makes you feel all warm and fuzzy - homey – welcome. All things you want people to feel when you’re trying to sell your home!
Okay, let’s say your house isn’t on the market - you have guests dropping by and you don’t plan on baking – but you have been and the remnants may still be in the air. An easy trick is to quarter up an apple and throw it into a saucepan full of water, along with a stick of cinnamon and a few whole cloves. Bring it to a simmer and leave it on a low flame. The whole house will smell like fresh baked apple pie! Just be sure to keep an eye on the water so it doesn’t evaporate all the way – or you’ll have the fire department dropping in next. (Not always a bad thing; have you seen the LA Fire Fighters? Yummy!)
Now getting back to the bad odors food can leave on your breath. There are some natural remedies that are available even if you are out to dinner at a restaurant! Chewing fresh herbs works wonders at ridding bad breath, especially from eating garlic or onions. Parsley isn’t just a garnish! If you chew some and swallow a bit, it will continue to help your breath for quite some time. Since parsley is high in chlorophyll, it also helps with digestion. Other herbs that help neutralize bad breath are basil, mint, rosemary and thyme. I’ve also been told sucking a lemon that has been sprinkled with salt works as well, although I’ve not tried that method…just lime and salt…but that was just to kill the taste of the tequila shots.
Bad odors don’t just happen to good people – they also happen to good cooks! And like heat, odors tend to rise. Nothing worse than crawling into your fresh linen sheets only to have the smell of pork lingering overhead. It kind of goes without saying that whenever you are searing meat, frying with oil, or cooking with seafood, it’s a good idea to open a window or two and turn on a ceiling fan to quickly get the smells shifted outdoors. But people often overlook the bits that creep upstairs…so do the same on your upper level and crack a window, turn on a fan – you will be glad you did come bedtime. For especially difficult lingering odors, put on a large kettle of water to boil (like you were making spaghetti)…toss in a few halved lemons, squeezing the juice into the water and tossing in the rinds as well as a few whole cloves (the spice - not garlic!) or some nutmeg – keep it on the boil until the essential oils have absorbed all of the fishy and/or oily odors in the air and your kitchen will smell fresh before you know it.
Now what about getting the smell of onion or garlic off your hands? The best solution I have found is to rub your hands on stainless steel. Sounds like magic – works like magic too. I have a piece of stainless steel the size of a well used bar of soap that is made especially for this purpose. If you don’t have this little luxury item, rub your hands on anything stainless steel – your knife sharpening rod is good – a knife would be good too … but watch out for the blade. What good are odorless hands if they are bloody?
Let’s see, we’ve covered good smells, bad smells – that leaves the outrageous. I have to mention this, although it is rather disgusting, but it is such an amazing freak-of-nature phenomenon – it must be shared. A loved one (who, like all others with supernatural powers, shall remain anonymous) can emit this one fart that smells so much like an egg salad sandwich, you have to experience it to understand what I am about to say… We were visiting with an ex-college roommate a couple years ago and somehow the topic of this “egg-salad” fart came up. The ex-roomie sheepishly admitted that weirdly enough, upon smelling one – they would actually start craving an egg-salad sandwich! I about fell off my chair – because it is so true! (Now THAT’S the really disgusting part). Inspiring egg salad sandwiches without uttering a word...it's a gift I tell you!!!
“Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.” Doug Larson
I am never eating egg salad again.
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